The Unofficial Waffle House Dining Guide
Photo by Simon Daoudi/Unsplash
I moved to Boston from Atlanta around a year and a half ago, pre-vaccine, when stepping foot in a grocery store still had a post-apocalyptic feel to it. So when I finally got the shot and Boston started opening up again, you can imagine my shock at finding out that the city I had lived in for months at that point, despite being overrun with students, had very, very little to do past 10 p.m.
Yes, there are a handful of clubs that blast the whitest of white people music until 2 a.m., complete with hordes of slack-clad undergrads attempting—and usually failing—to dance to the beat, but that’s never really been my scene. As an aging millennial, though, “going out” in that sense has lost some of its appeal anyway, especially as my ability to consume more than two drinks in a single night without experiencing a truly gut-wrenching hangover fades to oblivion.
For me, the real tragedy of Boston’s nightlife lies not in the lack of any remotely danceable music but rather in the lack of late-night eateries. I mean, yeah, you can get late-night McDonald’s anywhere, and there are a few small spots that stay open late to feed those who do straggle home from the club in the wee hours of the morning. (Looking at you, Ajeen in Allston: You have my heart.) But there are few establishments open late that offer the absolute, uninhibited magic you will find at Atlanta-area Waffle Houses.
For those yet unacquainted with the restaurant, Waffle House is a diner chain that’s open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. It serves mostly breakfast food, but you can also snag burgers, fries and even T-bone steaks there as well. To be clear, the quality of the food is not great, but Waffle House is notable not for its actual waffles but rather for its late-night atmosphere. Fluorescent lights beat down on heavily lidded, bloodshot eyes attempting to scan the overwhelming, laminated menus. Cooks, fully visible to the whole restaurant, shout orders at each other over the frying sounds of hashbrowns and bacon. A pair or small group of patrons are always getting into an alcohol-fueled disagreement or going through a tearful breakup over strong, bitter mugs of coffee.
While Waffle House is dotted all over the Southern U.S., Atlanta boasts a disproportionately large number of locations: As of 2019, there were 263 locations in the metro area alone. And any young person who has gone out in the Peach State has probably found themselves at a Waffle House in the middle of the night at some point. It’s an experience, it’s a rite of passage and it’s a must-see spot for all those who fantasize about the gritty diner aesthetic so prominent in early 2010s indie films.
But a successful trip to Waffle House takes some knowledge and preparation. Order an egg white omelet, for example, or visit at noon on a Tuesday, and you won’t get the experience beloved by locals. So, without further ado, here are some rules you should follow when you visit a Waffle House:
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