The League: Episode 3.11 - “The Guest Bong”

“The Guest Bong” is an example of something that has probably happened before on television, but that a handful of obsessive pop culture observers dread: an entire episode where the jokes are variations on a meme. Normally, the way things have gone since the explosion of the Internet meme into our culture, television begets the memes: Tom Haverfoods from Parks and Recreation, for example, or to another extreme, the insane and kind of wonderful phenomenon surrounding My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. This time, The League took a meme very popular this year and made it the key plot point of the episode: “The Guest Bong” is one giant string of “Damn You, Autocorrect” posts, a half-hour meditation on the (sometimes serious, but usually very funny) failures of predictive text and other technological foibles.

It’s playoff season in the league, and the Shiva draws ever closer. Kevin and Jenny have both clinched playoff berths, which means the remaining spots will be chosen in battles between Pete and Taco and Ruxin and Andre, whose team name is now The James Bond-Dres (“00Winner”). Previous winner Ruxin gives the video address, a tirade which involves a lot of threats that sound like rough drafts from Eminem’s comic book-character phase (the words “taint” and “taco” appear within several words of each other, to give you an idea). Only problem is, he broke the cardinal rule and used the work computers and software to make the video, getting him in hot water with HR. He tries to suggest the language is being used in case work, but apparently you can only use the phrase “balls deep” a certain amount of times.

And they’re off to Gibson’s, where Andre has developed a mysterious accent after attending a calf implant conference in London for three days and speaks in rhyming slang for parts of the episode and is generally uncomfortable and hilarious. Pete has a new girlfriend, Danielle, with whom he’s having autocorrect problems (he wanted to engage in “Alan Six”), setting up our theme for the evening. Ruxin, too, is having autocorrect problems: his email autocorrects “Andre” to “Andrea Kolotkin,” his cleaning lady, who is then subjected to the league’s filth and Ruxin must go see her production of A Christmas Carol for penance. Also, Ruxin has a Hotmail account, which leads to a few email service provider jokes. (According to The League, Hotmail is “the official e-mail of foreigners and poor people.”)

Ellie’s new BFF from gymnastics class, Chloe, is invited to sleep over. Only problem is, turns out Kevin prosecuted Chloe’s father, Gavin, on assault charges, and he was sent to prison for two years. They have an awkward reunion, and there’s a cheap prison rape joke in there, which is not outside The League’s sphere but is just generally disappointing when it comes to comedy writing. Kevin explains after this that what galvanized the rift between him and Gavin was the fact that he received a funny autocorrected text from Jenny right as Gavin was being taken into custody. (Something about a pen exploding in her bag, but “bag” being spelled “vag.” You kind of had to be there.)

The playoffs commence, and Taco, despite getting toasted the entire episode (there are a lot of “the cloud”/“The Cloud” lines), defeats Pete, whose downfall was letting Danielle commandeer his lineup. She refuses to play Michael Vick as his quarterback, presumably because of the whole dog-fighting thing, before asking, “Ben Roethlisberger… has he ever done anything wrong?” Big Ben underperforms, Taco wins and goes to celebrate by getting even higher. The “guest bong” of the episode’s title refers to his process of leaving subtly produced bongs made out of household objects (Kevin’s is the pepper shaker) so he can smoke anywhere, at anytime (“living in ‘The Cloud’”). Courteous houseguest, Taco.

The league champion receives his come-uppance and looks headed straight for Sackoville as Andre defeats him in the playoffs, a fact they both discover while watching A Christmas Carol. As Tiny Tim gives his touching speech, a frustrated Ruxin counters with a string of Frustrated Jay Cutler-caliber insults, which are inadvertently seen as directed at Tiny Tim, his HR guy’s son. Whoops.

Meanwhile, at Chez Suburban Couple, Ellie’s pal Chloe can’t sleep without her “fuzzy,” a security blanket. Jenny calls Gavin so he can drop it off for her. He texts Kevin to give the heads-up, but oh, that autocorrect! “Chloe’s fuzzy” becomes “chloroform,” and Kevin becomes terrified. He goes for the gun, only to discover that it’s missing. Turns out the guest bong wasn’t the pepper shaker, but Kevin’s gun. Kevin and Gavin call 911 at the same time, and Kevin proceeds to tell the dispatcher the autocorrect story, which gets him rushed off the phone. A terrified Gavin, not knowing what is going on, runs into Taco, who is smoking out of the gun and wearing the Mr. McGibblets costume. Taco offers him a hit and the whole thing sends Gavin out the door in a panic. Kevin (who is probably scared of Mr. McGibblets anyway), follows the two into the snow, and I’m pretty sure this is one of several episodes this season that has ended in someone getting tackled. Appropriate for a show about fantasy football.

Overall, there were still a good number of laughs, Andre’s annoying was more entertaining than Kevin’s annoying and the return of the slightly terrifying but still amusing Mr. McGibblets at the end was a nice throwback to Season One. And on a personal note, I would like to thank The League for not making any Tim Tebow jokes. One overexposed, overdiscussed cultural meme is enough for this episode.

Miscellaneous goodness:
Danielle’s reactions to Andre. A simple “You must be Andre” can say so much.
“This is some Cape Fear shit.”
Andre’s The Transporter speech about “carrying loads.”
As often happens on the show, the league highlight the latest in fantasy football parlance. This week, “Plaxidentally.”
Taco is still calling Cam Newton “Came Newtown,” which makes me laugh far more than it should.

The League: Episode 3.11 – “The Guest Bong”